I think it only fitting that sometimes this becomes a recipe place. Here is the recipe I created this week:
Potato Salad with Pesto Vinaigrette
Several small potatoes, diced and boiled until tender
the pesto left in the jar when you’ve used almost all of it
juice of 1/2 lemon
several tbsp of balsamic
several tbsp of olive oil
squeeze a lemon into the pesto jar. shake in balsamic and drizzle in olive oil. shake. pour over potatoes. add salt and pepper. put in a large bowl and shake. refrigerate or eat at room temp.
So, I work at a children’s theatre. This inevitably means that the majority of people in my day to day life are under 14 years old. And I love that.
Today was the day that the cast found out their roles in Beauty and the Beast. Kids who had parts that some people might consider small, were elated. Kids who were cast in roles that they might not even know what they’re really doing yet, were cheered on and praised for a great job by the others. Z, who was cast in a principal role, during a later discussion about fears and expectations for the rehearsal process, contributed “I expect to make new friends and meet new people.” No diva here.
I love my kids, and going in to a world where the staff creates and the children embody this spirit of joy in just doing and being together, and creating a wonderful process and product, where everyone is welcomed and embraced for who they are. And I will come back to read this post on the hard days, to remind myself why it’s all worth it.
I have realized in this week where I have had both planned and unplanned free time, that I have a dangerous obsession with facebook. Worse, I have a dangerous obsession with the Facebook App School of Magic. I play it all the time. I refresh the page constantly. I flip back and forth between this app and other apps while I’m waiting for settings to reload so I can continue playing this app.
Two things that I conclude from this. One…our society really is developing a scary techno-world that detracts from our ability to do things like read books and hold conversations. Two…I really miss old school video games. I used to play final fantasy, and now I have this not nearly as cool app that taunts but doesn’t fulfill my needs for character driven, complicated plot, low tech video games. I think I need to hook up the super nintendo again.
So, today I went back to work. Getting on and off buses sucks…although one kind driver did lower the bus without my having to ask – he must have noticed my sad penguin-hobble. I am exhausted, but I need to stay up a little longer to write, because I owe it to myself, and also because I haven’t been falling asleep well, so better to be as tired as possible so that I collapse into bed.
When I unwrapped my feet tonight they were a mottled purple that makes them look even more freakish than the swelling. And the middle three toes on each foot are purple to the knuckle. I think tomorrow will be ice but no wrapping, and perhaps a nice warm soak.
On an entirely different note…I’m sure that most people who know me know about my intense fear/hatred of the telephone. I have two calls that I have to make for work tomorrow…one of which I have been putting off, the other of which is somewhat immediately necessary in nature. And tonight my phone fell during class and the display isn’t working…is this fate on my side, saying “sorry, you can’t make these calls” or is this fate laughing at me saying “look, now it will be even harder and you won’t even know if you’re calling the right person”…I don’t know.
It’s weird, writing into a vacuum like this. I know that people read what I write on livejournal, and on facebook, and via email. But with the exception of one person, I’m not sure how many people even know this blog exists. And while I like it that way, it’s also very strange.
I’m a bit rambly tonight…which means I should probably stop. Perhaps tomorrow something with more substance…or less bruising…
So, last night, I let my class out early, because we’d completed everything scheduled. I gathered my stuff, stopped at the ladies’ room, and prepared to go out into the rain for the T ride home. Walking out the front door of CAS, I was definitely not fully paying attention to my feet – does anyone, really? And then, I missed a step, and wet stone is not forgiving.
So, the weight of my bag pulled me to the right first, and that ankle rolled. And then I tried to catch myself and overbalanced to the left, and that ankle rolled. I fell hard. A really nice woman helped me try to get up, but I only got as far as sitting. Another woman offered to call for help, but I caught my breath and thanked them both and sat on the wet step and called Jen to come pick me up. The thought of the B-line on two injured feet/ankles was more than I could possibly imagine doing.
So I explained to Jen where I was and what happened and then hung up so she could drive. In the cold rain and with the pain, I knew I’d need distraction while I waited so I called my mom. We caught up on the family news, I made my way from the cold stone to a wet bench, and it started to rain harder. We talked until Jen called to let me know she was nearby, and could I cross the street to the other side? I gritted my teeth and said sure.
It took two changes of the light to get across the street, since I couldn’t exactly rush. When I got across the street, there was no bench, so I was glad that Jen arrived at that moment. She reminded me to take some ibuprofen (duh!) which started to reduce the tear-inducing pain to a throb, and we made our way home.
This morning, the swelling and bruising are ugly, and walking down stairs is like torture, but I’m healing, nothing is broken, and the ankles are fine, even though the tops of both feet (tendons, ligaments, whatever it is that I beat up when I rolled outward) are pretty beat up.
I get it, I get it. Sometimes you’re doing too much and moving too fast and you need a reminder to slow down, ask for help and focus on the things that you can do while sitting still…but does the reminder have to be quite so painful?
i admit, i had grand plans, and then of course, yesterday, i posted nothing. but it was also an odd day, since i worked from 8 am to 11 am, and didn’t immediately crash afterward…i got groceries, did laundry, watched bones, hung out with jen, made dinner…and generally had a pretty nice patriot’s day, even if it did begin at 7 am.
i took today off from wct for the purpose of housecleaning…and also because april vacation is one of the few times that i can take a day…i’m ahead of the game on much of what i need to be getting done right now…and not behind on the other stuff at least.
i think that if i didn’t have to work, i would have a sparkling and beautiful house. i love to clean. i love to cook. deep inside, i really am a domestic goddess. but the problem is, i’m also an intellectual snob. so the idea of staying home and keeping my house beautiful is appealing, but ultimately, not fulfilling. while i love to scrub at grout with vinegar and a toothbrush for the satisfying gunk that peels away, and i love to lemon juice my counters and wash my towels and recycle everything that isn’t moving…it’s not enough. but i miss it when i don’t have time for it.
i think it all comes back to balance. how do i balance the need for intellectual stimulation (which i definitely do not have enough of right now), the need for artistic outlets (ditto), the need for human interaction (which i do have, and love), children (ditto), organization (yes! mostly…at work anyway…organization at home is a work in progress), cooking/cleaning/decorating (only on the rare day of “rest”)…?
ultimately, it may not BE possible. but i refuse to stop wanting it all. i have many needs, and i think that strategizing about how to make my life fit them all is a worthy goal…
i don’t know where this will go, but i think writing is writing. and so tomorrow i try to blog as often as possible with the intention of daily. maybe this writing retreat will lead to real writing practice. and maybe i’ll finish the play that has crept out over the past two years…